About eighteen months before I ditched the Witch and became the Bitch, I suffered with a bout of vertigo.
The main symptom of vertigo, is a horrible unbalanced feeling, even when you're sober.
The first time I experienced this, it was possible that I was still drunk from the night before, so when I swayed and had to catch onto the bathroom sink to stop me falling over when I got up to pee in the middle of the night, I just mentally filed the experience away, and didn't mention it to anyone.
The next time was first thing in the morning, and it was a rare morning after an alcohol free day.
When I was walking down the hallway, I staggered, and my husband thought I was having a stroke.
One visit to the doctors, and he diagnosed vertigo.
During the consultation, he asked me that question..
How much do you drink?
Without even blinking I answered
Oh I have a couple of glasses of wine, about four times a week
Poppycock! ( I have waited a long time to use that word)
Of course I lied. I lied to my doctor, my friends, my co-workers, myself about how much I was drinking.
But here's the weird thing. I lied because I was embarrassed about how much I was drinking, and because I was in denial.
And there is a stigma associated with drinking too much and having a "problem".
As we all know.
NOW, I lie about NOT drinking.
Oh I've given up because I get so much heartburn/ I'm on a diet/ doing a challenge for charity/insert your own excuse here
OR, I surreptitiously drink AF beer or wine, so that no -one notices. (A kind of lying, I think)
And the reason I am lying?
Because there is a stigma associated with NOT drinking!
It's like the three bears :
One Bear Drank FAR TOO MUCH!
One Bear Drank NOTHING AT ALL!
And the last Bear Drank "JUST THE RIGHT AMOUNT!!
Except the last Bear is a BIG HAIRY LIAR!!
Just food (porridge) for thought xx
I'm still at the stage that I have lied to the Doctor about how much I drink:(
ReplyDeleteI always did. Thankfully, my health does not seem to have suffered to the extent that I have had to confess. I think that the important thing is that you are honest with yourself. Its a cliche I know, but admitting I had a problem, was the first step I took to fix it. xx
DeleteThe best time to quit is when you realize you need to lie about it, but before it impacts your health.
ReplyDeleteDoctors need to learn to ask about this more tactfully.
I'm still fibbing! I confess to not drinking 'now', but not 'forever' as that really scares people. The problem is that every time I say "oh no - not forever" it plants a little seed of thought....
ReplyDeleteI lie to my doctor too. There is a form I feel out and asks how much you drink a week. I put down 2-4 glasses a week. I never thought about it twice until a few years ago I realized that I am lying. To my doctor. To myself. That's when I started thinking about quitting.
ReplyDeleteOh! I found your blog!
ReplyDeleteI lied to my doctor for a long time.
Then I got mad when I finally told one the truth and he wouldn't give me the pills I wanted!
Yikes!
Now I am very glad!
xo
Wendy