Day 45! I missed a couple of days posting this blog, and I really missed it!
It seems that I have to remind myself that this is really happening, I am going to be a NON- DRINKER forever!! And Ever.
At some point, I will stop counting days. I will stop hesitating to think what I should say when someone offers me a glass of wine....in fact, someday, nobody will offer, because I am a NON-DRINKER!!
When I was very young, I got married to my best friend. We never should have got married, we should have remained best friends. However, everyone in our crowd was getting married - so hey! Why not?
We planned the big day - although my mother said occasionally, "what's wrong? It feels like I am dragging you up the aisle!!" (Red Flag, don't you think?)
I joked with my Dad in the car going to the Church - "If it all goes wrong, can I come home" (self fulfilling prophecy maybe?)
And when I finally walked up the aisle, although I was extremely happy and excited for my new future, in the back of my mind came the nagging thought "is this really forever?"
Less than two years later, we separated, and finally divorced. It was as as amicable as these situations can be. I wasn't ready for FOREVER, and as it turns out, neither was he.
Three years ago, on 7th July I married again. There was no white dress, no church, just us, close family and a group of friends by a lake, with a barbeque and a Justice of the Peace.
There wasn't the euphoria and excitement of the first wedding, just a calm, peaceful feeling that this was (is) forever, and that it is the best decision I have ever made in my life.
Like Sobriety. It's not a starter marriage. It's forever. And it's beautiful.